Don't have SiliconIndia account? Sign upForgot your password? Reset
How to digest insults in office ?
I have been insulted by my boss in front of my colleagues and sub-ordinates. Sometimes and most of the time I quit the place without any reaction. Is it correct or should I retaliate with assertive skills?
I feel there should be no room for insults. Criticism is invited though, but insults should be taken seriously.
Why does it happen? Are you the introvert one in your team or are your really performing poor ? If u r introvert or say, in your own world (u kinda adjust wid everything) then you have to change. or you need to perform better. If it's neither then grow up n ask ur bloody boss : What's up ?
well, that's what I did.n that's what you should do.in proportion to the relation u have wid your boss. I was fired .lol so beware
No need to digest such behavior which you feel insult. No matter he behaved alone or in front of other colleagues. It is better to talk to your boss, when you feel he has sufficient time to discuss with you and in a calm mood. Openly discuss what you felt bad and off course if there is some misunderstanding/confusion, clear it immediately. As per my opinion don't handle this situation on event/incident base. There is need to understand each other behavior and expectations in office.
First, you need to understand 'why' it's happening & ONLY THEN can you devise/think of 'HOW' to respond--the key here being "RESPOND" & NOT RETALIATE ['retaliate' includes a negative response or 'reaction'...so to say, while 'respond' EXCLUDES negativity].
To summarise what they mentioned in addition to my points, pl give the following inputs:
1] Are you the only one your boss picks up for this treatment/insulting?
2] Since when do you know your boss--as a boss AND as a person/individual? [sometimes proximity makes some to behave the way he does].
3] Are you getting good/OK/bad appraisal reviews?
4] You mentioned 'he insults you', but you haven't mentioned the EXACT context/topic under discussion when such insulting happens. Without getting into the details, can you mention a couple of them? The reason this is important is that 'unknowingly' you may have caused it thru your choice of words or actions.
5] While it's normal for similar situations as a part of office politics, repeated occurrance does need a response--what it can be needs to be figured-out.
Insults are injuries to one's self respect, even more so if it happens in front of others.
Why don't you talk to your boss about it when he is relatively in sober mood...inform him that such insults are actually affecting your performance and morale.If it is happening time and again, better late than never and discuss the matter openly with him, and if the behavior continues in the same manner escalate the issue, but just be prepared that sometimes that can backfire too..
1. Check it once from ur end, is there any mistake in your work?
2. Then say directly to your boss infront of your colleagues. Sir you insulted me no. of times previously. y r u insulting me? I don`t want to bare it next time. Please understand it. And don`t repeat it.
3. thats it.
---------just check the above points if u feel gud, u can continue....... otherwise leave it ............